The word “duck” is 75 per cent obscene. – Lenny Bruce

When she saw the sign “Members only”, she thought of him. – Spike Milligan

“Do modern puns exist only in English? No, puns exist in nearly every language.” Whimsy columnist CLIVE WILLIAMS takes a serious look at the world and history of silly puns. 

A pun is a form of wordplay that exploits multiple meanings of a word or similar-sounding words to create a humorous or rhetorical effect.

Puns rely on ambiguity, homophones (words that sound the same but have different meanings), homonyms (words that have the same spelling and pronunciation but different meanings) and idiomatic expressions.

They are often used in jokes, literature, advertising and everyday conversation. 

Puns are widely used in literature and have been a hallmark of clever wordplay in famous works. William Shakespeare frequently used puns in his plays. In Romeo and Juliet, Mercutio, after being mortally wounded, predicts: “Ask for me tomorrow, and you shall find me a grave man.” The word “grave” meaning both “serious” and “a burial place”, making it a tragic yet witty pun. 

The use of puns dates back to ancient civilisations. The earliest recorded puns appear in Sumerian and Egyptian texts, suggesting that humans have long enjoyed playing with language.

Puns were common in hieroglyphics, where visual and phonetic similarities were often used to encode multiple meanings in a single symbol. 

In classical literature, Greek and Roman writers, including Aristophanes and Cicero, used puns for humour and persuasion. The Bible also contains puns, particularly in the Hebrew Old Testament, where wordplay is often used to emphasise religious or moral lessons. 

Do modern puns exist only in English? No, puns exist in nearly every language. Since all languages have words with multiple meanings or similar sounds, punning is a universal linguistic phenomenon. 

Chinese is particularly rich in puns due to its large number of homophones. In Mandarin, the word for “fish” (鱼 yú) sounds like the word for “abundance” (余 yú) which is why fish are a common symbol of prosperity in Chinese New Year celebrations. 

Japanese puns rely on the language’s many homophones. They are frequently used in advertising and comedy. 

French puns often rely on words with similar pronunciation but different meanings. For example, “Sans les mains” (without hands) sounds like “cent limains” (a hundred leeches), creating humorous misunderstandings. 

Spanish also has a tradition of puns, often used in poetry and everyday jokes. An example is: “¿Cómo se llama el campeón de buceo japonés? Tokofondo.” (“What’s the name of the Japanese diving champion? Tokofondo.” / “Tocó fondo” means “he hit the bottom.”) 

Here are more English examples

The fattest knight at King Arthur’s Round Table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from the algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery. 

Two silkworms had a race to escape; even so, they ended up in a tie.

A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. 

After cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste for religion. 

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak are feeling the cold, so they light a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sinks, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too. 

Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says: “I’ve lost my electron.” The other says: “Are you sure?” The first replies: “Yes, I’m positive.” 

He walked into the actress’s dressing room and tripped on a bra; it was a booby-trap.

A book just fell on my head; but I only have my shelf to blame. 

Bakers trade bread recipes strictly on a knead-to-know basis. 

On a lighter note 

A Russian anecdote for a change: During the Cold War, the diversity-conscious CIA trained one of its spies to speak perfect Siberian Russian then secretly inserted her into Siberia to establish deep cover.

She made her way to a boarding house and asked for lodging in a perfect local accent and dialect and wearing local clothes. The receptionist looked up and asked, “Are you a spy?”

The American was shocked. She said: “Of course not! I’m from Novosibirsk! Can’t you tell by my accent and clothes?”

The receptionist replied: “You certainly look the part, but there aren’t any black people in Siberia.”

Clive Williams is a Canberra columnist

Correction: in the previous Whimsy column, an Australian ambassador to Washington Michael Cook was wrongly named John. This was an editing error.